Sailing

I ran into a friend that I hadn’t seen in years one day and she said something to me that at the time seemed innocuous but later I thought about what she had said and it got me to thinking. I was into my last year of college and when I told her that she was very supervised and said that she never would have thought that I would go to college, little long graduate. Now she didn’t mean this suggesting that I was not able intellectually to achieve such a goal, but more that when she knew me it was not in my personality; what she said was that I was the super laid back guy that didn’t care about anything and just sort of drifted through life taking things as they came. Again, she meant this as a compliment, she even stated that she loved that about me; how easy going I was, how I never got mad about anything and always seemed to have fun. It was much later that for whatever reason I thought of her words once again and realized that she was right, but not in the way she intended. I was very much just drifting through life without a care in the world. I didn’t care about anything or anybody, I didn’t care about the future, or where I was heading. To some this may seem like the perfect course to take, but I think that the only way drifting through life works is if you are one of the fortunate few who have an outside source of income and your future already secured for you; otherwise you are simply drifting out at sea at the will of the wind and currents (yes from here on out I am using nautical metaphors).

Now for a while, especially in your youth this may be ok and actually a bit of fun as you never know where you will end up next; and for some they are eventually blown to a tropical oasis and live happy comfortable lives. For most though I think that eventually you end up marooned on a desert island or on sandbar after sandbar waiting for the next good tide to come in and save your ass once again, these people never throw anchor, and I believe are never truly happy; however one man’s desert island is another’s paradise so this does not hold up evenly across the board. But that was me and a lot of people liked that about me because I was fun loving and care free as they say. I had the sails to raise and the all that I needed to plot whatever course I chose, I just chose not to do so. One day though I decided enough was enough and I plotted a rough course that over time, as plans do, changed and became more refined as time went on and. I raised my sails to begin my journey, I was still rolling with the punches and maintained much of my fun, care free personality; I just chose to take life a bit more seriously as I did not wish to stay adrift forever. Now as anyone who has taken both of these courses will tell you, the latter is not the easiest one, indeed drifting is the easier of the choices because there is no course thus you cannot be blown off of what is not there. However once you plot a course you must stay true to it and weather whatever storms or obstacles that come before you, and sometimes that comes at a cost that some people are just not willing to pay, or just do not have the will or desire to see through.

These people will often change their course and settle for an easier one rather than the one they truly desire, and it seems that those people will never be truly happy or fulfilled; it is the storms in life that we face that shows us how much we truly want something by what we are willing to sacrifice and go through in order to get there and this is what I believe separates people in life. Now let it be said that sometimes the new, easier course turns out to be the better one for some people or the sacrifice that may need to be made in the name of staying the course is simply not worth it in the end, such as a relationship for a dream job for instance, in these instances it is not a matter of weakness but more a realization of what is truly important; I think only a fool would sacrifice everything to reach a goal unless all they care about is themselves at that final destination and then they will begin their new life, and for some that is the case and is indeed good for them.

The storms that we come to in life, as I stated earlier, are the true test of how badly we want to reach that final destination and show us how just what we are made of and how much we are willing to invest, risk and, endure in order to reach that distant shore. We all run into these storms from time to time and they can be little more than a summer squall or as powerful as a category five hurricane, I have endured the entire spectrum. I believe that another one of the things that separates people in life is the ability and the foresight to see these storms on the horizon so there is time to make a plan and a decision on how to navigate the impending danger. It seems to me that some people just do not have the ability to do so, or for whatever reason chose not to and then… BAM… they find themselves without warning in storm after storm and without having the chance to make a plan on how to handle the issue. They find themselves in a bit of trouble and sometimes that oversight cost them more than what they were willing to risk or wanted to loose, perhaps if they were aware of what lie ahead they would have chose an alternate course; but then sometimes as we all know, these storms can pop up out of nowhere; but more often than not there is usually a warning sign, you have just have to be willing to read the skies. Once that storm is sighted though the choices must be made to go through, around it, or simply re-plot your course for different shores. This can be difficult though because in order to sail around the storm it may take longer than you had planned pushing back your arrival time and thus all plans made once in port, or sailing through it may put at risk things you are not willing to risk or do not want to lose such as a relationship, job, house, what have you. One thing I have found though, especially with the big storms, once you have committed yourself to sail through it must be all hands on deck and you must never leave the helm. It is here that you will be tested and perhaps not just in your desire to see this through but in other aspects of your life as well.

It is here you may see how strong your will is and just how well your precious cargo, something perhaps like a relationship, was secured to the decks. Sometimes you come through unscaved, a little tired and beat up but all the stronger for it and more ready for the next storm. Other times you may have lost some precious cargo or you may be barely limping along just looking for the nearest port to pull in and call it a day. It is now, especially if you have suffered loss or damage that you will again be tested. Do you go forward, pull in to port for repairs, or perhaps throw anchor? Some though, even some I have known, with sails gone and the rudder broken just opt to stay a drift in the manner I described earlier. The cost may have been too much and their spirit/will was broken. But I believe that is truly these test that make us who we are and help us appreciate finally reaching our destination, it is these test show us what we are capable of. And even if your course was changed, if the trip proved to be more than you could or were willing to endure, you have still gained more experience than the person adrift, for you truly are a fool and was destined for failure from the beginning if it was all for nothing. Me, I was the person who was originally adrift, then plotted a course and had a storm leave me with no sails or rudder and that is how I remained for a while and is where this friend had came into my life initially. But, I pulled into port, made some repairs, loaded up on cargo (and a new first mate), plotted a new course, and set sail for my destination; this is where she again saw me after some years, sails full and heading for the horizon.

I believe that from the many squalls and storms that I have endured, my time spent adrift, and the help of my new first mate that nothing will stop us from reaching our final port, throwing anchor in that sun drenched harbor, and living happily. I know that there will be more storms and perhaps we may make an adjustment or two to our course for whatever reason, be it storm or change of heart. But with the wind at our backs, sails at full mast, and our eyes constantly searching the skies for a sign of a storm we will one day reach our destination together and embark on more journeys and adventures as I am sure our life will not be a stagnant one; that is one thing I love about anchors as opposed to roots, they can hold you in place for as long as you desire, but they can be pulled at a moment’s notice if you wish or if perhaps the waters in that particular harbor get a bit too rough and threaten to pull your bow under at the crest. Roots on the other hand are a bit harder to pull, and that is why I sail though life.